And I've never gotten used to it, I've just learned to turn it off

"If you see here, say hello." I recline back and think for a second that maybe things might shape up, but who am I kidding? There isn't anything here for me and maybe there never was. Or is there. With constant confusion, I've being pulled by the elements and I'm left to wonder what the hell's going to happen now. I know there isn't a single thing for me to think about at this moment, but at the beach I both missed Jyg and easily put her out of my mind. The Squid has that power, by the way. The kid, not matter how much of a ruckus and a fit she can cause, still manages to make me happy. And each day I'm pulling away from what I want because what I want is becoming too corrosive for me. And yet, while I try my best to say I don't love her anymore, the truth of the matter is she still holds whatever tatter bits are left of this heart. When did this blog become about holding onto the past? Isn't it supposed to look forward towards the future?

If you get close to her, kiss her once for me
I always have respected her for busting out and gettin' free
Oh, whatever makes her happy, I won't stand in the way
Though the bitter taste still lingers on from the night I tried to make her stay.

A day at the beach:

Philosopher and I had decided to go on our own instead of inviting Doll and the Binx. It was going to be us and the Squid who was excited on the whole trip there. We stopped at the same Whataburger we tend to stop by whenever we go to the island. When we got there, we noticed that the shoreline, which is normally at the shoreline, migrated north, getting dangerously close to the sand dunes. We took the Squid in and played, and in the process hurting my back, which wasn't a big deal, but meant I couldn't handle her for too long. When a wave finally hit the car, we decided it was time to pack up and think a plan over. We ate sandwiches and Squid had herself a Dora head cookie. I find such cookies morbidly wrong. We were constantly stared by an old man who sat across from us and that gave me the creeps. Every so often, I'd raise my head and make eye contact and he'd shrug off and turn towards the waves. Squid then maanged to scarf down a bag of M&M's which she lovingly calls Ms.

We drove back onto the sand, hoping that the tide had calmed and for the most part, it had. Squid, feeling urge to take on her nickname's purpose, decided she wanted back into the water, where she managed to puke up some of that chocolate she had stuffed in her belly. I'm sure had I not seen it, or Philosopher for that matter, she wouldn't have announced her regurgitation. Philosopher washed off her face and we went back to the sand to make sand castles by the car. After a while longer of that, we returned to brave the strong waves. Squid, once again taking on the meaning of her name, became rather slippery and even heavier as she would drop down and not stand on her own. Once the happiness became too much for any of us to handle, we sat on the shoreline and dug for "snails" which were actually clams. After a while, Philosopher and I saw something floating not to far away from where we sat. I said it was a balloon, but was really a condom filled with air and salt water. Then a wave decided to rough house us, taking us by surprise, and knocking us over - Squid was sitting on my lap - and was the deciding factor it was time to pack up and go home.

On the way from the Island, I saw a cat, merely out of kitten form, pawing up at the sky in dire need of assistance as it had been hit by a car. We were on the expressway and there was no salvation for the animal.

Don't think too hard, if you think it hurts that bad
Don't talk about it, don't let it get you down
It's only one part, of the story
Just let it go, don't let this get you down now.